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4/17/2003 12:11:24 PM
moods
other people's moods now affect me. i used to not notice it before, since i always had the lowest mood in a group, but now i realize that i have to be careful. its not that others are bringing me down per se. but i am easily influenced by the moods of those around me.
we had a beautiful 80+ degree day in the city yesterday. and although i had a crazed work day, i did manage to leave work at a reasonable hour and meet a friend in the village for ethiopian food. afterwards we hung out and played video games for a bit.
life was good. i was happy. i woke up happy.
today everyone at the office is irritable because its 40 degrees and rainy. its also the day before a holiday and we've got a bunch of killer projects due by end of day. i completely do not feel creative and am having problems just concentrating on what's on the screen in front of me. its noon and the day is dragging slowly.
my happy mood has dissipated. i'm irritable and cranky. i im'ed my friend to ask him how his day was going, and he was a bit depressed. the weather, life, lack of sleep are keeping him down. and as much as i want to help, i know i truly can't. but when he refuses my help or company i feel even more irritable and angry, and honestly, a bit rejected.
all of which are false emotions. i know he's not pushing me away. some people deal with being blue better on their own. i know that my cranky mood will change once i get to leave here and go on with my life. i know that i'm still happy.
its just going to be a long day.
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